Credit Card By Jennifer Goolihan

Dear Jennifer,

I have a close girl friend who is smitten with a credit card (actually, the two of them have been friends for many years). My friend relentlessly talks about wishing it'd open its eyes and discover that she's the one for it. It loves women of all kinds and likes to flirt and I know it throws lots of compliments and stuff her way, but it also recently told me it would never approve her.

She is continuing to pine but won't confront the credit card directly about her feelings. So it feels it would be presumptuous to tell her it's not interested when she hasn't even applied for it. Should I actively discourage her, or even tip her off to its lack of interest next time this comes up? It is a major topic of conversation.

--East Coast

Ugh. You know way too much here. I feel for you. See if you tip her off, she'll know you and the credit card were talking about her, and in an unflattering way, which is humiliating. If you don't tip her off and she finds out you knew, she'll feel like the last to know, which is humiliating. If you don't tip her off and she never finds anything out, she will keep throwing herself at a MasterCard credit card who doesn't want her. Humiliating.

Of course the reason this is all so humiliating is that she has chosen to treat it as some kind of big embarrassing high school secret, when she should just embrace her feelings, whether they're reciprocated or not, and talk to the credit card. Maybe even apply for a credit card!

But since she won't, the best things you can do, in order of priority, are to: 1. Shame the card company out of pre-approving her when it knows she's desperate for it. I mean really. How cruel can you get? 2. Suggest she either talk to it or move on, because she's torturing everyone she knows with her credit card debt.

Avoid credit card debts!

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